Category Archives: Sexual Health

Aging and Sex

aging

One of the most important needs of mankind is to relate emotionally and physically and that includes the ability to have effective sexual relationship. Sex is a natural instinct and men and women are natural sexual beings. Through sexual relationship one begets children. Probably the main purpose of sexual relationship is procreation and only at a later stage, when the family is formed and the relationship is stable that one becomes drawn towards sexual relationship for recreation. When this happens sexual relationship will take a different turn from a more penetrative sexual relationship to a more non-penetrative sexual relationship. These is not the norm for most couples especially when the male partner is still virile and consider penetrative form of sexual relationship the only approach to sexual expression.

 

Aging has an impact to sexual relationship. Problems of sexual dysfunctions both in men and women occur when men and women aged and experience deterioration in their health. Physical disability is also another negative factor. As far as the sexual organs are concerned the less they are used the less effective they become or otherwise if they are regularly used. If they cannot be used then appropriate medical intervention is recommended

 

For men with ED, the causes for ED need to be evaluated and appropriate treatment provided. The options are plenty and involved improving blood flow into the penile musculature. Viagra maybe another option provided the therapy is safe for the patients. Hormonal causes of ED need hormonal replacement therapy.

 

For women, if the problem is related to low sex drive, testosterone therapy can be provided along with estrogen therapy and if there is less lubrication, water-based lubrication can be provided. Both parties can be counseled about non-penetrative sexual relationship and TLC.

 

Touching is one of the most sensuous experiences one can enjoy but along the way this basic experience is lost. Probably all is not lost when one soon realize that touching can be a satisfying option of sexual expression.

 

ED – erectile dysfunction
TLC – tender loving care

When Size is the matter!

Penis enlargement products are becoming big business globally and Malaysian males are getting into it as well. There are miracle pills and oils and not to mention the various exercises and stretching massage that are advertised in the local papers with pictures of ‘Urut Gurus’ making rediculous claims.Now with the internet,junk mails full of penis enlargement materials are also getting in the e-mail in box of every person on the planet. Do they work? Are they safe? Does a man need to worry about the size of his penis? These are the issues this article will examine.

 

For starters we need a good understanding of how the penis is constructed, and how it works. The penis is composed of three chambers; the two cavernous bodies (or corpora cavernosa) which lie side by side on the top of the penis, and the spongy body (or corpus spongiosum) which is centered below the other two. The spongy body surrounds the urethra, and extends out the end of the shaft to form the glans. All three chambers contain small hollow areas that can fill with blood to produce an erection. Surrounding all three bodies is a semi-elastic membrane called the tunica albuginea. The arteries that feed blood to the penis are surrounded by smooth muscle fibers that normally limit blood flow to the penis. When a man is aroused by thought, sight, or physical stimulation, the muscle fiber relaxes and blood flow into the penis increases. The spongy tissue of the penis fills with blood, causing the penis to swell. The size of the erect penis is governed by the tunica albuginea membrane, just as a bicycle tire limits the expansion of the inner tube inside it. As with a bike tire, once the limit of the membrane is reached, further pressure results in firmness rather than expansion. The veins that drain the penis lie close to the surface, and are compressed by the erection, thus slowing flow of blood from the penis.

 

The only muscle in the penis is the smooth muscle fiber that controls erection, and this muscle can not be built up in the same way skeletal muscles can be. Even if this muscle could be strengthen, doing so would only serve to reduce blood flow to the unerect penis, making it smaller. In order to lengthen the penis the tunica albuginea and the spongy bodies would all have to be lengthened. The tunica albuginea is flexible to a point, but repeated stretching does not lengthen it the way the ear lobes can be lengthened.

 

So, “buyer beware” is vital when looking at things that claim to enlarge the penis. There is no way to guarantee you are getting what you are sold, no proof it works, and no legal recourse if it does not work. Even worse, there is no guarantee the device, exercise or product is safe. Herbs are unregulated, even though some have been proven to have nasty side affects, so harm is possible.

 

69% of men over estimated the size of the average penis, some by several inches.One other thing should be covered before we look at the methods advertised for “male growth” – how big is the average penis? In one Internet poll 69% of men over estimated the size of the average penis, some by several inches. For a long time studies done by Kinsey in the late 40s were quoted, but there are some serious problems with these studies. The Kinsey study was based on self reporting of men who responded to a post card mailed to them by the Kinsey institute. This gives us two problems, the men may have exaggerated, and the sample is not demographically valid. It has since been found that, surprise, a man with a big penis is more likely to volunteer for measurement than a man with a small penis. Web sites trying to convince men they need to be bigger give the average at 6 inches (15.25 cm) and larger, but science says otherwise.

 

So what is average? In the last ten years there have been several statistically and scientifically well done studies on penis size. The most famous of these studies, done by the University of California School of Medicine and reported in the Journal of Urology in 1996, found the average erect penis to be 5.1 inches (13cm) in length and 4.9 inches (12.5) in circumference. Studies done by the Department of Urology, University of Florence, Italy, and St. Mary’s Hospital, London, as well as at other medical institutions, have give results that vary from 5.03 to 5.3 inches (12.78 to 13.46 cm).National University of Singapore gave a figure of 10-13cm during erection and isolated Malaysian Study gave similar figure.However size vary when not erect!

 

Let’s look at the products available to make the penis bigger.

  • device> Pills: It only takes a bit of reasoning to understand why these could not work. What kind of drug could enter the blood stream and affect only the two specialized tissues in the penis?
  • Creams: These are targeted to the penis, and anything rubbed onto the penis is going to be carried away from the penis by the blood stream before it could get to the tunica albuginea or the spongy bodies.Some of these creams that contain aromatic oils can actually cause mild breast enlargment in some men because of the estrogenic effect of some of the aromatic oils (like teatree and lavender)!
  • Surgery: There are two techniques that doctors can perform that do actually add size, but both are full of risks. For more length a doctor can cut the ligaments that attach the penis to the pelvic bone, and then move the penis outward some. This gains a man only about an inch, risks infection, and can leave the penis less stable because it’s no longer anchored. For more width, fat can be injected into the penis. Unfortunately the fat does not stay put, and it can become lumpy or gradually leave the penis.
  • Somatotherapy: Injecting irritants into the penis skin to cause tissue expansion can be dangerous if the lax connective tissue under the skin swells and thickened.The penis skin can become enormous and the penis will look short and stumpy!Penis penetration will be impossible!
  • Stretching exercises, weights, and stretching devices: Those promoting these technics offer a variety of explanations for how they work, but most of these explanations are contrary to the facts about how the penis is constructed. Some parts of the body can be enlarged by mechanical stretching, but this has never been shown to occur with the penis, and most experts doubt the tissue involved can be expanded in this way. Some urologist have voiced concerns about scaring, nerve damage, damage to the blood vessels, and Peyronie’s disease (bent penis syndrome). While there are isolated claims in some well controlled studies of such devices eg.Andropenis-penis extension device (www.andromedical.com ) improving penis size, to date is far from conclusive.
  • Jelqing: The Jelq is the most common method of penis enlargement being touted today. Basically jelqing consists of a “milking” motion down the penis that is supposed to gradually increase both length and circumference. The technique is said to be something used by men in the Middle East for centuries. But no one can back that claim up, and experts of Middle Eastern Traditions never heard of such practices!

 

We must weigh the possible risks against the possible benefits.
The bottom line is this – pills and creams cannot possibly work, and surgery which does work can leave a man disfigured or impotent. The “unproven” methods have a theoretical chance of doing some enlarging, but they also have a very real chance of doing long term and permanent harm if not monitored by professionsls. In the end each couple must weigh the possible risks against the possible benefits. We have looked at the risk. what about the benefits?

 

So, does size really does matter, and can a penis be too big? We have heard from several men and women who have problems enjoying sex because his penis is large – it may be a rare problem, but it does happen. The book “The Kinsey Institute New Report on Sex” (1990) says that more women report concerns and apprehension about too large a penis than report being unhappy with a smaller penis.But for guys who are really small, do not hesitate to seek professional help.Getting treatment from charlatans can be disaster!

Which ED drugs are safe and effective?

Question:
I will be sixty (come next January) and my wife is two years younger. We have sex once a week with the aid of Viagra. However, I read a recent article on Viagra which stated that it can cause “stroke in the eyes”. Since then I have stopped taking Viagra and now am unable to have sex anymore. My sex life is empty and I am at a total loss because I feel very embarrassed to go to the doctor or pharmacies to ask for other ED drugs at my age. Could you please let me know about other ED drugs, which are safe and effective that can be bought over the counters without any hassles?

Answer:
Erectile dysfunction of various stages afflicts about 2.4 million Malaysian men above the age of 40 and you are not alone. Less than 2% of these men ever seek medical assistance. A majority of them are like you, trying all sorts of medications without doctor’s prescription or without seeking your friendly Family Physician. Seeking medical assistance is never a hassle and ones see the pharmacist to fill ones prescription and not seeking treatment. Being sick is not a sign of weakness so also having problems with erection.It is high time men understand this. Taking a scheduled ‘poisonous’ drug like Viagra without doctor’ advice can be dangerous because you do not know who to refer to if you were to experience any side effects. The loss of vision associated with PDE-Inhibitor like Viagra is due to a condition called nonarteritic anterior ischemic optic neuropathy (NAION). NAION presents itself with a painless onset of a vision loss in one eye. The most common visual symptom is an inferior visual field defect, where the lower half of an object appears blurred blocked; the drug’s label currently has no warning of a risk of permanent vision loss. However Viagra as with other PDE-5 inhibitors like Cilais and Levitra have been the favorites because of the convenience of being oral medications. These drugs are safe if prescribed by a Physician and not otherwise. There are other treatment options available for the management of erectile dysfunction besides the oral medications.Intracavernosal injection therapy, vacuum erect aid devices and penile implants are some of the treatment available. Complimentary therapy includes active glycoprotein extracts of the herbs Tribulus and Eurycoma (Tongkat Ali) which has been found to be proerectile and seems to work for some men with mild ED.

I’m worried because my new partner says he wants to have oral sex on me, but I’m concerned and embarrassed about my piles. Do you think he’ll be disgusted? What can I do about them?

Question:
I’m worried because my new partner says he wants to have oral sex on me, but I’m concerned and embarrassed about my piles. Do you think he’ll be disgusted? What can I do about them?

 

Answer:
When men decide to go down, they are interested in lashing their tongues on their partners’ clitorises and the upper part of the vulva. It is unlikely they lash their tongues on the lower vulva which is closer to the anus if they are freakish to the anus. Even if they do so it is unlikely they notice the odd looking anus or the piles if the piles are protruded. If the piles are not that prominent it will not be noticeable. If you are not comfortable to give in do inform him that you may want sometime to think about giving him the permission to go down on you. I am sure he will respect your wishes. During that time you can get treatment for your piles.

 

I’m worried because my new partner says he wants to have oral sex on me, but I’m concerned and embarrassed about my piles. Do you think he’ll be disgusted? What can I do about them?

Question:
I’m worried because my new partner says he wants to have oral sex on me, but I’m concerned and embarrassed about my piles. Do you think he’ll be disgusted? What can I do about them?
Answer:

When men decide to go down, they are interested in lashing their tongues on their partners’ clitorises and the upper part of the vulva. It is unlikely they lash their tongues on the lower vulva which is closer to the anus if they are freakish to the anus. Even if they do so it is unlikely they notice the odd looking anus or the piles if the piles are protruded. If the piles are not that prominent it will not be noticeable. If you are not comfortable to give in do inform him that you may want sometime to think about giving him the permission to go down on you. I am sure he will respect your wishes. During that time you can get treatment for your piles.

Vaginitis

Question:
Dr, I’m a woman, happily married for 4 years and have a wonderful & active sex life.
So far, I don’t have problem with my sex health since 2 weeks ago.
As a normal woman, I don’t have problem with my vaginal discharge/white discharge.  But since 2 weeks ago, the color & quantity change. From pure white to yellowish or almost greenish.
I haven’t seek any help, but it’s really a disturbance.
Need your kind advice on this matter.

 

Answer:
Glands inside your vagina and cervix make small amounts of fluid. This fluid flows out of the vagina each day, carrying out old cells that have lined the vagina. This is your body’s way of keeping your vagina healthy and clean. The discharge is usually clear or milky and doesn’t smell bad.
The color and thickness of the discharge change with your monthly cycle. The discharge is thicker when you ovulate (when one of your ovaries releases an egg), when you breastfeed or when you’re sexually excited. Changes that may signal a problem include an increase in the amount of discharge, a change in the color or smell of the discharge, and irritation, itchiness or burning in or around your vagina. This is called vaginitis. A discharge that’s stained with blood when you’re not having your period could also be a sign of a problem. So also the yellowish and almost greenish discharge. If you have any of these signs, you should not hesitate to see your doctor or a gynecologist. Below are some tips of how to ward off vaginitis.

 

Tips on preventing vaginitis

• After using the toilet, always wipe from front to back. This may help prevent getting bacteria from your rectal area into your vagina.
• Wear cotton underpants during the day. Cotton allows your genital area to “breathe.” Don’t wear underpants at night.
• Avoid wearing tight pants, pantyhose, swimming suits, biking shorts or leotards for long periods.
• Change your laundry detergent or fabric softener if you think it may be irritating your genital area.
• The latex in condoms and diaphragms and the sperm-killing gels that are used for birth control can be irritating for some women. If you think one of these things is a problem for you, talk to your doctor about other types of birth control.
• Avoid hot tubs.
• Bathe or shower daily and pat your genital area dry.
• Don’t douche.
• Avoid feminine hygiene sprays, colored or perfumed toilet paper, deodorant pads or tampons, and bubble bath.

I have a big time queef or vaginal fart each time me and my hubby perform doggy style. How to curb this problem?

youngQuestion:
I have a big time queef or vaginal fart each time me and my hubby perform doggy style. It amuses me a lot and Iʼm totally embarrassed because of this. How to curb this problem? Help!

 

Answer:
Queef or Flatus vaginalis is air coming from the vagina during or after sexual intercourse. In popular speech it is called a vaginal fart.

 

• Air is pumped into the vagina by the penis moving in and out. In some position this happens quite easily, like doggy position

• This air has to escape, making it sounds as if the girl is farting, but it comes from her vagina and is odourless.

• Of course this can be embarrassing, but it is no big deal when you are both able to laugh about it. Maybe you can make recording of it just in case it did not happen anymore!

 

 

 

 

There is no standard solution to avoid vaginal farting. But you could try the following:

 

1. If you do it ‘doggy style’ you can try to rise or lower your upper body, making the penis enter from a different angle.

2. Your partner can try short instead of long deep thrusts. When the penis stays in the vagina deeper, air might not be pumped in to begin with.

3. Change position.

4. Use a water-based lubricant when you start, applying it to your vagina opening and the are between your small lip, easy for the penis to slide into your vagina.

5. You can spread your legs more or keep them closer together. You can tighten your grip and during pelvic trust your partner keeps his penis inside till sex is over.

 

If you also pass flatus, the smell is of course revealing and don’t blame it to your vagina. Deep thrust can dispel gas accumulated in lower end of the colon and produce the flatus.

 

I’m worried because my new partner says he wants to have oral sex on me, but I’m concerned and embarrassed about my piles. Do you think he’ll be disgusted? What can I do about them?

Question:
I’m worried because my new partner says he wants to have oral sex on me, but I’m concerned and embarrassed about my piles. Do you think he’ll be disgusted? What can I do about them?

 

Answer:
When men decide to go down, they are interested in lashing their tongues on their partners’ clitorises and the upper part of the vulva. It is unlikely they lash their tongues on the lower vulva which is closer to the anus if they are freakish to the anus. Even if they do so it is unlikely they notice the odd looking anus or the piles if the piles are protruded. If the piles are not that prominent it will not be noticeable. If you are not comfortable to give in do inform him that you may want sometime to think about giving him the permission to go down on you. I am sure he will respect your wishes. During that time you can get treatment for your piles.

 

My vagina feels pain and sore whenever my partner uses a condom. Without it, everything is fine. How do I remedy this problem?

Question:
I’m 23 and have just started being sexually active. My problem is my vagina feels pain and sore whenever my partner uses a condom. Without it, everything is fine. Both of us feel that using condoms is the best and safest way of contraception and we would like to stick to it. How do I remedy this problem?

 

Answer:
Some man and woman experience adverse effects with condoms. They are allergic to the additives that are present in the condom besides the proteins and the lubricants. With new generation condoms that are hypo allergenic this is no longer an issue and if some mild effects are present like mild pain and soreness, the reasons might be the dryness of the vagina and maybe the prolonged friction brought by the less sensitive penis(less sensitive because of the condom).In these cases a good water based lubricant would help. If this too does not help then you need to consider other method, like the pill for example or non penetrative sex for contraception

 

Any ways too speed up his libido and to make me feel the climax?

Question: Hi there! I’ve been married to a wonderful guy in August 2008. I was a virgin until I got married. I do know lots of techniques, positions and tips although I’m not involved practically, thanks to the info on the net these days! First month of our marriage was good, I took almost 10 days to get penetrated, it was very hurtful. After that, all had been smooth sailing till he left to his country. We were together for at least 20 days from the day we got married, minus the 10 days of inable to penetrate, 7 days of my period, so we had good sex for about 3 days till he went back. I was back alone in my country for 1month without him (visa waiting).Now I’m with him and it’s been a month now. First 2 weeks our sex was really good, and then I noticed he started to slow down or get excited quickly. We\’re not planning to have kid at the moment, and he loves the pull out method. Using condom is very disturbing for both of us and we decided to just go on without it but every time he gets climaxed, he pulled it out, that where I will be frustrated because I was almost cum. He even inserts 3 fingers n it was so smooth and I’ll ask him to go faster, but I can’t feel it coming. Am I being loose down there or? Even during sexual intercourse, its very hard for me too feels it nowadays. So I’ll ask him to do faster because it excites me but he will get tired easily. These days we had been just cuddling and kissing on the bed n he’ll go to sleep after that. Is this a normal situation for newly married? On the other hand, I will get upset so fast and emotional because didn’t get to do it. What is happening to us doctor? Any ways too speed up his libido and to make me feel the climax? I’ve spoken to him and he told me he’s too tired because of the office work. He wanted it but he tries to cut down quickly everytime he caresses my private parts.
Answer: So the honeymoon is over and back to day to day activities. When things get out of tune then you got to get it fixed, together as a team and not through tantrums. You mentioned that you were a virgin before marriage. It’s like getting a car and you have never driven it before, then you learn to drive against all the odds and get through. Now you are getting the hang of it and you like to drive as often as you can even with the slightest excuse. You are driving your mate like you are driving that car! Lovemaking is not just getting off. You might get off but he has to work hard and stressed up. When one is stressed one has no control on oneself. That’s what happens to your mate. He was doing fine before you are broken in. Now its look like you has broken him! The signs of stress are tiredness, unable to focus or to concentrate and more so in love making, erection is short lasting and ejaculation is too fast. Maybe you need to slow down, do more non penetrative sex than penetrative sex. Enjoy body mutual contact and massages. Enjoy caressing with mouth and tongue. You can encourage him to tongue your clitoris. The gentle and moist touch of the tongue will drive you to nerve shattering climax. You can let him finger your G-spot, the area at the roof of your vagina,3cm from your vaginal entrance, with deep stroke and if you started to feel the urge to pass urine, that might be the sign of impending climax and maybe female ejaculation, just do it. You will not pee, the flow from your vagina is your ejaculations. You will notice that he will be strong and hardy in the morning and his flagpole will remain steady fast. This will be your opportunity to ride him on and you will be able to experience a headsplitting climax. Look into the positive side of lovemaking. You have got a long way to go. Always bring back the car to fill the tank full and not to get it overheated!