Answer:
Bringing up a child is the responsibility of both parents. Children need to be rewarded for any achievement and that include staying in their own bedroom. Encouraging then to sleep in or co-sleeping every time they are afraid is not the best solution for both parties. Critics of bed sharing have argued that co-sleeping may interfere with a child’s development, create psychological problems, or compromise a youngster’s sleep habits However, there are two sides to the controversy. Some parents and experts argue that bed sharing with parents makes for comforted, tantrum-free children, and may even help their sleeping patterns. Others have claimed that bed sharing leads to a healthy sense of self for a child and to stronger, closer parent-child relationships. Recent studies show that children who bed-share are not more likely to have emotional problems than children who don’t, and that bed sharing before 6 years of age appears to have no major impact on a child’s development or behavior.

Many psychologists feel strongly that parents and children should be sleeping in their own beds. Parents should get kids excited about the independence of sleeping in their own room. Make a game out of it, giving them gold stars or rewards for making progress. Start a new habit of going into your child’s room and reading a bedtime story but do not sleep there. Comfort your child by being available, but allow co-sleeping only on special circumstances (such as the occasional thunderstorm).

To help a child overcome fear of the dark, it would be helpful to buy a lamp dimmer, so that the child will feel more comfortable and safe. Draw the threshold and make it clear that your bedroom is off limits. It may be difficult at first, but in a short time, children will develop their own methods of soothing themselves and feel safe, secure and comfortable under their own covers.

Imagine the wedding night scene when the couples were all geared up to do the thing when all of a sudden the woman screaming and clutching the precious pole trying to keep it from shrinking or instead of the wife screaming the husband fuming over the tight va…. like as though it is disappearing and the inverted nipples of the partner. Yes! that is what happens when Koro comes knocking at your door.

Koro or otherwise known as Genital Retraction Syndrome (GRS), generally considered a culture-specific syndrome is a condition in which an individual is overcome with the belief that his/her external genitalia , in females, the vagina ,diminishing in dimensions and nipples are retracting into the body and breasts shrinking, or in some male cases, the penis and testicles may be pulled into the body or disappear. A penis panic like the scenerio describes earlier which of course if it occures in a huge male population may cause a mass hysteria of zombie looking males all clutching their diminuitive privates, least they disappear and cause the death of their owners.Penis panics have occurred around the world, most notably in Africa and Asia. Local beliefs assert that such syndromes are often fatal.

Genital retraction syndrome in Southeast Asia is known as Koro, which apparently comes from a chinese term Shook yang (suo yang, 縮陽), although no credible occurrence of such a phenomenon has ever been recorded there.It is becoming increasingly clear that these forms of mass-hysteria are more common than previously thought.

The phenomenon is often, but not always, associated with occult belief, such as witchcraft. These panics frequently, but not exclusively, occur in places where access to education—particularly in science and human biology—is limited, or otherwise restricted (for example, when government policies restrict such education). The term “Koro” which means “head of the turtle” in Malay is believed to be a culture-bound syndrome, is similar to penis panics in various cultures. Koro most commonly describes the extreme fear that the penis is retracting into the body, brought about by some supernatural powers and that such retraction will bring about death. Koro also tends to reflect a certain xenophobia among some groups, whereby foreigners are often blamed as the ones behind the “attacks”.

Although Koro goes back to ancient times, beliefs have evolved to better suit modernity. Whereas in the past the causes were usually identified as supernatural, e.g. sorcery, a recent Koro episode in Northern Thailand placed the blame on Vietnamese Communist agents who supposedly put chemicals in the water supply.Sufferers may resort to extreme physical measures to prevent the believed retraction of the penis. As well as affecting individuals, Koro-like syndromes can often occur in an outbreak of mass hysteria.Probably the best treatise ever decribed about this unique fenomena of koro is the details written by Robert E.Barthelomew in the book Little Green Men, Meowing Nuns and Head-Hunting Panics: A Study of Mass Psychogenic Illness and Social Delusion , and the excerpts goes like this, “In parts of Asia, entire regions are occasionally overwhelmed by terror-stricken men who believe that their penises are shriveling up or retracting into their bodies, whereupon they will die. Those affected often place clamps or strings onto the precious organs or have family members hold the penis in relays until an appropriate treatment is obtained, often from traditional healers. … Episodes can endure for weeks or months and affect thousands. Psychiatrists are divided as to the cause of these imaginary scares. Some believe that it is a form of group psychosis triggered by stress, while others view it as a mass hysteria. … While these episodes may appear humorous to Westerners, they offer a valuable lesson because they show how vulnerable we all are to mass delusion.”

The man at left is suffering from an acute case of koro, or genital retraction syndrome (GRS) during the 1985 epidemic in Guangdong, China. (Photo courtesy R.E. Bartholomew)

Koro most commonly strikes men, but rare cases are known to involve women and the fear that either their external genital or nipples are retracting into the body.

Aside from the emotional distress, Koro by itself is not physically harmful, and no actual retraction takes place. Injuries have occurred when stricken men have resorted to apparatus such as needles, hooks, fishing line, and shoe strings, to prevent the disappearance of their penises.
An epidemic struck Singapore in 1967, resulting in thousands of reported cases. Government and medical officials alleviated the outbreak only by a massive campaign to reassure men of the anatomical impossibility of retraction together with a media blackout on the spread of the condition.
Koro has been successfully treated with a course of alprazolam and imipramine (which are psychiatric drugs, the former used to treat anxiety disorders).

Therefore folks do not be alarmed.There will be no knocking at your door when you are doing the thing.If you have problems do not go to the shamans or the dukuns.Do see your favourite doctor.Everything will be back in place.

I suppose the label Men No Pause will be the choicest of labels most men after 50 would want to put on their doors when they meet friends of similar ages to brag about their colorful lives, their women conquest, the fast cars they have and the overseas trips they made. Of course there will be no mention of failing health or failing memory or failing strength, everything is fine if not better as though age freeze for them. Their better halves of course will have their own sessions. They are very much down to earth as they know age has caught up with them and they will not hesitate to be very open about their failing health, their ailing body and the number of trips they have to make to see their personal doctors and the number of trips they have to make to see their personal beautician for make over’s.

Women of all ages are aware of the term menopause unlike men who only know that men no pause. In fact there is this saying that life begins at 40 for men! That implies that before 40 they are children or teenager. That’s not surprising when you can see middle age men before 40 still hold on their membership in Youth Clubs and Youth Section of political parties!

Men as women do go through aging process or rather they pass through the golden year that is a real challenge to their health. In women their reproductive function ceased as they menopause. The female hormones wane dramatically following symptoms suggestive of emergence of menopause like flushes, mood swings, panic attacks, insomnia, palpitation, anxiety, loss of libido and depression. Other than that there is this tendency of contracting some chronic illness like hypertension, diabetes, coronary diseases etc. which is part of aging.

With regard to fertility, similar changes are taking place in the males as well. After 50, their fertility wanes but not ceased. That’s probably the reason why they keep trying to knock down young women even their artilleries are in bad shape. They produce less sperms with poor quality and started to have problems with their sexual prowess and especially if they contract diabetes, hypertension, hypercholesterolemia and coronary diseases. More than a third of them will have prostate problems, like enlarged prostate that might have a negative influence in their sexual function because of frequency in passing urine.

Having low testosterone does not just affect their libido. Testosterone is important for men. It is this elixir that gives them the male characteristics, the so called macho and virility. The very same hormone gives them the strength, the lean body mass, the muscle bulk, the bone strength, the heat and of course the libido. It is this hormone that maintains sperm production and sensitizes the sex center to respond to sexual desire. Just imagine what will happen if that very same hormone level dwindles down. This situation is called Andropause and sometime is also known as male menopause. You see a pathetic looking male with no sting. He sometimes look frail, no muscle, only bones and skin. He may appear grumpy and quarrelsome. He will have similar symptoms as seen in menopausal women like flushes, night sweats, insomnia, loss of memory, palpitations and specifically in men loss of nocturnal erections and looking fatigue. If this is something that is welcoming to him then it’s alright.

No men would want to be in that state, looking hopeless and helpless.
Like menopause, Andropause is now a recognized health issue in men. Men with ‘late onset hypogonadism’ or LOH as it is also being known as can be treated by Testosterone Replacement Therapy. Before testosteone is instituted, the aging male need to go for a medical assessment to evaluate his health status. His medical condition if any need to be treated. His prostate will be evaluated prior to providing him testosterone therapy. Since this therapy can be for life time, he needs to come for regular follow-up to monitor his prostate and general health. There is also alternative therapy in the form of herbal supplementation. Certain herbs like Tribulus terrestis and Eurycoma longifolia or Tongkat Ali have been found to stimulate the adrenals and testicles in producing natural testosterone. The water soluble extract have been found to be useful with less side effects. If he has problems with his prowess, medication that can improve blood flow to his genital organs can help, if the medication is suitable for him.

Men need not stay behind and suffer in silent. They need to emulate their better halves in opening up and take charge of their health. Putting the Men No Pause sign will not help. The signage should be Men Do Pause.

Question:Warm regards to you. I like to know why and how and ways to overcome it. My question is my level of climax is too fast.Not even 2 minutes. Why is that so? Thank you.

Answer:
You are actually suffering from a condition known as rapid ejaculation and this happens because you do it in a hurry! When you are doing it in a hurry you will lose your focus and concentration and will ejaculate fast besides not getting what you and your partner aim for. Imagine you are doing a run and you make a dash from the very beginning, you will find yourself pretty exhausted halfway and will not be able to compleete the run. The same thing will happen to you when you make love to your partner in the same manner. You start your love making with heated passion. This will make you lose your concentration and focus. This willl result with you losing control and ejaculate. Try to take it easy by first warming up and take time to do the penetration. Firm up the pelvic floor muscles when you do the penetration and contol your pelvic thrust when you penetrate. Keep the penis in the vagina when you maintain the pelvic thrust so that the tip of the penis gets less pressure. You can put more pressure to the vaginal opening with the base of your penis and when you are ready you can do rapid pelvic thrust to increase pressure to the vaginal entrance, focussing on the clitoris and roof of vagina. As you are doing the pelvic thrusting you continue firming up your pelvic floor muscles so that in the event you ejaculate your erection is still firm enough to give more stimulation to the vagina to make your partner climax. This technique of lovemaking is known as Coital Alignment Technique. You need to practice this technique regularly to get use to it. If you still have problems you need to consult a doctor.

Question:
My husband and I have a wonderful sex life, but right after we have intercourse he almost immediately falls asleep. I, on the other hand, could go another round, go for a jog, clean the house. I’m so full of energy. It doesn’t matter what time of day or night it is. Why does sex always knock him out while it gives me this super energy boost?

Answer:
Many women out there would give their right arm for an answer to this one. Therefore, here goes. One or more of the following reasons usually account for why a man falls into a post-coital stupor:

1. They are tired to begin with, and sex helps them relax and let go — figuratively and literally.
2. The hormones men and women produce at orgasm namely Oxytocin and the natural opiate Beta-Endorphins can lead to the desire to lie back in the afterglow, and that sense of physical peace often leads to sleep.
3. The ejaculatory release for men, and the inherent letting down of bodily tension, makes men physically tired.
4. Most people (again, men and women) hold their breath during sex, breathe shallowly or do not focus on breathing. There is a possibility that he is not breathing deeply. That gives him oxygen deprivation, which causes sleepiness. In addition, it could (rare, though) persist into the next day.

Here is my explanation about his post coital stupor. He is probably fatigued before sex and all of those sensations — including orgasm — just propel him into the state for which his body is yearning: rest.

In rare cases, men who are exhausted by sex may have a medical condition. If you suspect something more serious, make sure your husband sees his doctor for a complete physical.

Question:I have bad PMS, and so for about two weeks every month I’m on an emotional roller coaster. This has done real damage to our sex life. My husband has basically given up initiating sex since I so frequently turn him down, and he has a really hard time understanding what I go through. I do not know what to do.

Answer:
PMS is real! It affects the quality of life for millions of women, yet too many couples do not realize there are ways to battle this problem. Begin by identifying the specific symptoms you experience. Typical symptoms include fatigue, depression, irritability, angry outbursts, cravings for sweet and/or salty foods, headache, abdominal bloating, anxiety, confusion, difficulty with concentration and/or memory, swollen hands or feet, tender breasts and tearfulness. Next, keep a log of the dates you experience certain symptoms. On your monthly chart, mark your symptoms with a number from 0 to 10, indicating the severity of the symptom on a given day.

These charts will enable you to predict the onset of your internal warfare and plan ahead for its effects. Plan positive sexual times for you and your husband for the two weeks leading up to your symptoms. Then, depending on the severity of your PMS, plan for the type of sexual encounter that would meet your needs and help relieve your stress during that difficult time. For example, you might enjoy being caressed everywhere except your breasts and genitals. Alternatively, you may not want to be touched anywhere, but would enjoy caressing your husband. During those difficult two weeks, make time in your schedule for extra rest. Schedule a “walk-and-talk” time together to occur before your sexual time. Begin your actual physical time with a relaxing spa or a warm shower. Planning for your PMS will reduce the damage to your sex life and increase your husband’s understanding. It might also be possible to treat your PMS. Which may include healthy life style, vitamin supplementation and symptomatic treatment from your doctor.