Question
I was a virgin until my wedding day. The problem is on my first night with my husband, I did not bleed at all. Now my husband is having doubts about my virginity. Why did this happen and how can I convince my husband that I’m not lying to him?
Pure, Terengganu
Answer:
It is sad to know that at this modern time we still have men who are ignorant about the meaning of virginity. Virginity is a status and not a thing. That piece of thin flesh that covers the vaginal entrance, the so-called hymen may be present and may not be present naturally and even if it is present it can remain so even after sexual penetration if it is elastic and therefore is not a sign of virginity. A tear in the vaginal entrance or a tear of the hymen may be caused by a penetrating injury and not necessarily caused buy an erect penis if the woman claims so. Therefore the question of virginity does not arise if the woman insists she has not had penetrative sex with a man. The issue here is plain trust! Furthermore there is no reason for the woman to bleed if she relaxes her well lubricated vaginal entrance to accommodate the erect penis and more so if the penis is miniscule. Grow up man !
Monthly Archives: February 2011
When does one resume their menstrual cycle after an abortion?
Original Question:
When does one resume their menstrual cycle after an abortion?
Answer:
When a child is lost before the woman enters her 20th week of pregnancy, it is termed as a ‘miscarriage’ or ‘spontaneous abortion’. Mostly, miscarriage occurs when the pregnancy is about 12 weeks old. But because miscarriage, whether it is spontaneous or induced, it is a disturbing time for the woman, both physically and emotionally, it may take time for the menstrual cycle to normalize. In some women, it may stabilize soon after the miscarriage, while in others it may take a longer time. On an average, the menstrual cycle is restored between 4-6 weeks of a miscarriage. Resumption of the menstrual cycle also depends on how old the pregnancy was before the miscarriage occurred.Rarely if the woman has breast secretion( milky or watery secretion, medically known as galactorrhea), resumption of menstrual flow is even longer.This might be due to the presence of high concentration of hormone Prolactin that interferes with the menstrual rythm.Once the Prolactin level is normal, menstruation will take place.
When does one resume their menstrual cycle after an abortion?
Answer:
When a child is lost before the woman enters her 20th week of pregnancy, it is termed as a ‘miscarriage’ or ‘spontaneous abortion’. Mostly, miscarriage occurs when the pregnancy is about 12 weeks old. But because miscarriage, whether it is spontaneous or induced, it is a disturbing time for the woman, both physically and emotionally, it may take time for the menstrual cycle to normalize. In some women, it may stabilize soon after the miscarriage, while in others it may take a longer time. On an average, the menstrual cycle is restored between 4-6 weeks of a miscarriage. Resumption of the menstrual cycle also depends on how old the pregnancy was before the miscarriage occurred.Rarely if the woman has breast secretion( milky or watery secretion, medically known as galactorrhea), resumption of menstrual flow is even longer.This might be due to the presence of high concentration of hormone Prolactin that interferes with the menstrual rythm.Once the Prolactin level is normal, menstruation will take place.
When Sex Hurts
- How does lack of sexual arousal happen?
Lack of sexual arousal occurs when the mind is not ready, the sex hormones are down and the sex organs are not responding. - Is it possible to feel painful even if the man/woman is sexually aroused?
For the guys tight foreskin can cause pain during penetration and for the girls if they do not relax the pelvic floor muscle to allow the vagina to accommodate the penis, penile penetration can cause pain to the vaginal entrance. - Why does an intercourse feel painful when the person isn’t sexually aroused?
When the guy is not sexually aroused his erection is not firm enough and trying to do the penetration can be uncomfortable because the penis will bend, especially if the vaginal entrance is tight and not well lubricated which can make intercourse painful for the woman as well. - How common is it among men and women? Should they tell their partners?
If sex is painful and uncomfortable for either party, this needs to be mentioned so that it can be remedied. - How can a woman overcome this problem? Any self-help solutions?
If attempt at intercourse is painful to the woman she must remember to relax her pelvic floor muscle and if there is problem of lubrication she might need to use lubricating gel until she is confident after which she can cease using the gel. - What if these tips don’t help? What can they do?
If this simple tip does not help they might need counselling. Maybe they need to see their GP or a sex therapist - How can a GP help?
The GP will help them to understand their genital anatomy and in the case of the female partner teach her to know her pelvic floor muscles so that she can train to relax that muscle to facilitate penis penetration and accommodation. The GP can prescribe medication to reduce anxiety if that is necessary. - Will a sex therapist help? How?
The sex therapist can provide the same counselling except that they cannot prescribe medicines.